Are you a carer struggling to care for a loved one at home on your own?
When did you last take a holiday or get a break? When did you last put yourself first?
Do you think you are the only one that can do the caring?
What will happen to your loved one if your fall apart if you are not able to continue caring?
What is your support network doing to help you? Do they just expect you to keep going 24/7 365 days a year?
Do you not trust anyone to take over your role?
Do you have trouble saying NO – I NEED A HOLIDAY!
You’re Not Alone…
Why am I saying this?
Well, it is very easy to fall into this trap…. but you do not need to be a martyr to yourself.
You will not get any medals at the pearly gates for just soldiering on, on your own.
Yes trying to keep going when you get tired is heading for disaster not only for you but your loved ones too!
You need a holiday to enable you to keep caring longer.
Is This You?
So is this you? Do you not put yourself first?
Do you think you are managing well when in fact you may not be?
The reality is, if you became unwell then everyone is going to have to manage without you – and they do.
So if this rings a bell with you and you are telling yourself “I can’t take a holiday. No one else can do this job as well as I can.”
Or “I don’t have anyone that can relieve me.” If I am not here, what will happen?”
Maybe You Need A Break
Well I will tell you what will happen.
Support will arrive.
If you plan to take a break rather than wait to take a break, you will give your brain and body a holiday AND you will be able to keep caring for longer.
Have a parent that’s causing you stress?
Download our free Challenging Behaviors Guide to discover how you can figure out what’s going on and maintain your relationship, and de-stress each day.
For The Indispensible
Now to back this up I came across this article, “Graveyards are full of indispensable people” (apt don’t you think?).
While this is about lawyers it really fits for every person who thinks they are indispensable.
Check this out: http://thegirlsguidetolawschool.com/12/the-graveyards-are-full-of-indispensable-people/
You see by making yourself indispensable you ruin your life. Yep, it’s true.
Are you ruining your life? Are you driving yourself to an early grave? Are you really doing the best for your loved ones? Does this picture fit you?
You Don’t Have To Be The Only One
So if you think you have got yourself into a situation that you cant get out of…
That your loved one would not survive for a week or a month without you… you are wrong.
They will survive without you.
Sure they will miss you and you will miss them, but they will survive.
If you want to change and start thinking of yourself, then check this resource out. http://www.wikihow.com/Stop-Being-Indispensable
The Value Of Cross Training
The military know the value of cross training – of not creating indispensable people.
It could cost you your life, literally.
There is no difference between the military and your work as a carer.
Train someone to take over from you so you can have a life.
Let someone else do your job… Show them how to do it the way you or the person you’re caring for likes it to be done. What they are familiar with?
If you don’t know how, then check out these cross training tips: http://www.forbes.com/sites/chriscancialosi/2014/09/15/cross-training-your-best-defense-against-indispensable-employees/
Take A Break
Don’t be one of those people who kills themselves with work or being a martyr.
You are worth far more to your loved ones when you are rested, at peace and full of energy.
Look after yourself. Take a break. You owe it to yourself. You deserve a break.